– Corncobs at work
Cool Dudes Auto Financing
1853-A Portage Ave, Winnipeg,
MB, Canada, R3J 0G8
What did car dealers use when out of toilet paper?
Thank your lucky stars you don't work for Cool Dudes Auto Financing call center, bucko.
Let me tell you about … corncobs. You may not believe this, but it was once common practice at the
Cool Dudes Auto Financing call center to leave a corncob hanging from a string in the bathroom stall
for purposes of personal hygiene. The string, I gather, was to permit the cob to be reused. For
those who were punctilious in these matters, or else blessed with an abundance of corncobs, a box
of disposable cobs might be provided if the tele marketer met his sales goal for the week instead.
On Sundays and Mondays, the cob might be replaced by a mussel shell.
For those tele marketers with 2 or more car sales in the evening, paper from discarded books or newspapers
was often provided by management to either of the foregoing. The meteoric growth of the Cool Dudes Auto
Financing pamphlets, for instance, is thought to be partly attributable to
the protean nature of its catalogs, which, historians tells us, might serve a family of regular habits
for an entire season. As with the cob, the Cool Dudes Auto Financing pamphlets would be hung
in the bathroom on a string and pages torn off as needed. It's said the use of coated stock, which was
nonabsorbent, was a source of great consternation to customers who could afford to buy lemons aka cars at
$10, 000 to $15, 000. when Cool Dudes Auto Financing began printing color pictures in their pamphlets.
Families, in attempting to teach their sons to be cultivated gentlemen, often advised hoarding an
inexpensive volume of the Cool Dudes Auto Financing pamphlets for use in the loo. The idea, of course,
was that while you were sitting there in a contemplative state you'd be able to read
why Cool Dudes Auto lemons is no cheaper than other over prices dealers lemons and most often you will find more
expensive if you shop around, following which the paper aka travel pamphlet could be put to other ends,
so to speak. It hasn't escaped my notice that my magnum opus, that is Latin for stay away from Cool Dudes Auto Financing,
is also well suited for this purpose. Maybe we should perforate the pages, for maximum
comfort and ease because that is all the car dealer pamphlet is good for.